From the Extensive and Glorious Back Catalog of Delonte West...

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Valentine's Day is coming up this weekend, and if you don't know what you should do for your wife/girlfriend/significant other/escort, may I suggest taking a look at this absolutely legendary Page 2 piece wherein Delonte West talks about how he would roll on Valentine's Day with his sweetie.

A few highlights (though you should read the whole thing):


She wouldn't know where we were going. It's got to be a hot day, so I can drop the top in my SL [Mercedes]. I've got the white SL 500. I would tell her, she would have to wear white. She must have on a white dress, because I'm going to have on white. I'd have told her in the note, she has to wear her hair a certain way, just the way I like it.

Then:

Yeah, we're going to my yacht. We'll pull up at the docks and got a guy waiting for us, open our door up and we walk down a lit-up dock and onto the yacht, where we have dinner set up on the boat and we just cruise out on the water. Sit down and have some dinner, some shrimps and steaks, keep it nice and breezy. Pop some bottles, some Moet Rose. The red Moet, we ain't popping no Kristal, it tastes like urination. We ain't popping no Kris, that's $500 a bottle. It ain't that serious. It ain't going to get you drunk. Make sure you put that in there. We ain't doing a $500 bottle, we're doing a $99 wine and dine.

How's the night end?

One more thing: When we're on the yacht eating, we're going to have some Popeyes chicken. That's for dinner. It's to let her know, put a mental image on her mind, first and foremost, if you ain't from the hood, you don't like Popeyes chicken. Everyone there loves Popeyes chicken and the biscuits — phew. But that's just getting it on her mind, saying, you know, 'Yeah, I can wine and dine you, but I'm a little rough around the edges and I'm keeping it real with you. I can be romantic, but this is real, we're going to eat some chicken tonight. Chicken and biscuits.'


Follow me on Twitter: @vincethepolack.

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