If you haven’t seen Gladiator, 300, and at least one of The Lord of the Rings movies, then you might have a shot at not letting this movie crush your spirit. It’s not even like it’s bad enough to goof on; it’s just very not good. Although there are some cool castles and scenes of European valleys and mountains, and it’s always great to see Christopher Lee, even all Black Plague-y as Cardinal D’Ambroise, a big shot in the church who extorts our Crusade-deserting heroes Behmen and Feslon (Nicolas Cage) into transporting a witch (Claire Foy) to some other castle so she can be given a fair trial before they burn her. There are zombie-demon monks, witches, books, wolves that have to turn into worse-looking wolves before they attack, and some great supporting actors all speaking in different accents, including Cage and Ron Perlman, who play it for laughs with modern-speak and then get all serious and “ye olde” with it. But this isn’t their fault. It’s just a bad movie.
Director: Dominic Sena
Writer: Bragi F. Schut Jr.
Producer: Charles Roven and Alex Gartner
Cast: Nicolas Cage, Ron Perlman, Stephen Campbell Moore, Robert Sheehan, Claire Foy, Ulrich Thomsen, Stephen Graham and Christopher Lee