- Toby Keith
Look, we're as patriotic as the next guy (unless the next guy happens to be, say, Lee Greenwood), but we're pretty sure we'll never need some 10-10-220 shill taking a break from telling us exactly how much a buck is worth to deliver his U-S-A! U-S-A! fight song. Which is exactly how Toby Keith kicks off his latest disc, via the song "Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue (The Angry American)." And to be honest, it's much more offensive than Steve Earle's "John Walker's Blues" (written from the perspective of U.S. hip-hop-fan-turned-Taliban soldier John Walker Lindh) could ever hope to be.
"Oh, justice will be served and the battle will rage," Keith sings. "This big dog will fight when you rattle his cage/And you'll be sorry that you messed with the U.S. of A./'Cause we'll put a boot in your ass/It's the American way." And that's just a taste. The song is so completely over the top, it's almost obscene. Even worse, Keith later drags Willie Nelson down with him, on their duet "Beer for My Horses." Apparently, the best way to battle the Axis of Evil is to get shit-hammered on the tailgate of your truck.