Tom Segura

When: Sat., March 5

Tom Segura likes to talk about face tattoos, drug overdoses and his hatred for hipsters on bikes. He tells his stories candidly, and his honesty is what makes them crudely funny. He’s not a total asshole, though; he does feel guilty when he eats cookies made by the Keebler elves while watching episodes of Little People, Big World. This guy’s not for the easily offended, but he knows how to deliver the laughs. You might want to leave the kids at home for this one. He performs at 7 and 10 tonight and at 7 tomorrow night at MGM Northfield Park — Center Stage. Consult the venue's website for more info.