The Curse of Greg Brinda


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I got up at the crack of 8:30 this morning and headed to the gym. On the way there, I caught the last few minutes of the Mike and Mike show on ESPN radio, which is carried on WKNR (6 a.m. to 9 a.m.). Greenburg, Golic and guest Cal Ripken Jr. were breaking down the Cardinals' collapse in the NL Central and the A-Rod saga. As usual, great stuff. But also as usual, I forgot to switch the channel before I got out of the car. So when I emerged from the gym at 10:10 or so, whose voice was stuffed down my ears? Greg Fucking Brinda. I resisted turning the dial, risking my own mental health to hear a few minutes of Brinda's three-hour torture session. Call it work. I had been considering penning an article about Brinda, tentatively titled the "Top 10 Ways to Kill Greg Brinda in his Sleep So He Can Be Stopped From Reproducing and/or Torturing Again." But I wanted to make sure I wasn't crossing the line. I wasn't. Keep in mind, this was at 10:10 a.m., within 20 minutes of when news broke that Terrell Owens may have attempted suicide in Dallas. The Cardinals, meanwhile, are on the verge of one of baseball's most historic collapses, and the playoffs are right around the corner. Ohio State has its biggest test yet on Saturday, Charlie Frye might not suck, and the Cavs start training camp next week. Plenty to talk about, right? Here's what Greg Brinda had to say: "The fans aren't to blame." That's right. Contrary to popular belief, the fans aren't to blame for the Indians collapse this season. Actually, he proclaimed boldly, it's the players' fault. You heard that right. It wasn't you who couldn't throw runners out. That's on Victor Martinez. It wasn't you who struck out too much. That's on the hitters. And it's not you who's masquerading as Jhonny Peralta. That's Jhonny Peralta's fault. And Brinda has plenty to say about him, but he's just too mad to have an opinion. He actually said that. Too mad to have an opinion. Which, of course, is why he has his own talk radio show. -- Joe P. Tone

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