The Namesake: A Movie Review from the Douchebag Sitting Behind You

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I couldn’t be more thrilled about The Namesake when I saw the preview a while back. I didn’t have the sound on, but when I saw Kumar from Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle looking kinda stoned in his graduation gown, I figured it couldn’t miss. A sequel to the best movie ever made? Count me the hell in. Boy, was I wrong. I finally got to seeing it last night – it’s still playing Cedar Lee on a screen as big as my ass – and it totally blew. First off, Harold’s not it. And I’m not talking about one of those Wesley Snipes-for-Omar Epps in Major League 2 things. I mean, Harold’s NOT IN THE DAMN MOVIE! That’s like making My Best Friend’s Second Wedding with no Julia Roberts. A freakin’ travesty. Even worse, Kumar doesn’t show up until halfway through the movie. Until then, it’s just his parents hanging out in New York and arguing about what they should call Kumar. They are torn between Nick and Google for some reason; I’m guessing the old Indian dude is an IT guy. I have no idea why no one suggests just using his damn name. Personally, I find Kumar to be a perfectly respectable name. There is a brief scene which gave me hope: the one where Kumar and his replacement friends get stoned in the quad at school. Sweet. Kumar even says at one point, “Don’t Bogart that joint, man,” which was very poignant, because his buddy was totally fucking up the rotation – something we know Harold would never do. It’s all down hill from there. I don’t want to ruin the movie, but everyone dies. Huh-huh. Just kidding. I have no idea. I left early. -- Joe P. Tone The Namesake plays through Monday at Cedar Lee Theatre, at Cedar and Lee Roads in Cleveland Heights. For previous Douchebag Reviews, search this blog for “douchebag.” Go ahead, do it.

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