After $2 drinks, you won't even be able to spell 'relativity'


"Whoa, this is harder after nine $2 drinks."
Scott Anderson, who runs Lorain’s low-key Closing Room, might be the only bar owner who knows the anniversary of Einstein’s Theory of Relativity, that ground-breaking discovery that changed the way people bong beers. And he wants his regulars to be smart too, so he’s testing customers today at his E=MC2 Party. Way more importantly, he’s offering up $2 drinks. To help you prep for Anderson’s brainiac blowout, here’s a sampling of questions from an actual Mensa test that’ll make you the whiz kid of the party. You’ll find the answers at the end of the test. … 1. What is the following word when it is unscrambled? H C P R A A T E U 2. The same three-letter word can be placed in front of the following words to make a new word. What is it? _____light _____break _____time 3. What is the number that is one-half of one-quarter of one-tenth of 400? 4. If two typists can type two pages in two minutes, how many typists will it take to type 18 pages in six minutes? 5. If it were two hours later, it would be half as long until midnight as it would be if it were an hour later. What time is it now? Ready to check your score? 1. Parachute 2. Day 3. 5 4. 6 (one typist types one page in two minutes) 5. 9 p.m. Yeah, we didn’t get 3 through 5, either. Better yet, Anderson didn’t get any of them correct. Einstein is rolling over in his grave right about now. But least the drinks are still $2. The E=MC2 Party is from 2 p.m. to 2:30 a.m. today at the Closing Room, 13813 Lorain Avenue. Call 216-688-1670 for more info. – Cris Glaser


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