The Cure plays CSU’s Wolstein Center on Wednesday. But while these gothy alt-rock grandfathers have a back-catalog of some of the most ecstatic singles in the history of the known universe (“Just Like Heaven” and “Boys Don’t Cry,” to name two), they happen to put on the least kinetic live show ever, standing still while they reduce their greatest songs to shoegazing snoozers, and stuffing sets with 11-minute servings of psychedelic sludge.
In other words, if you bought a ticket expecting this ...
... you’ll have to sit through a couple hours of this:
I wrote this in Scene this week, and drew the wrath of Cure fans the world over, who took time out from sobbing in candle-lit rooms to write some pretty admirable hate letters. As a longtime Cure fan, I actually point out that this tour might be the first time the band has ever put on a good show. But somehow, this is lost on them. All that eyeliner must really screw with your head.
I'm flattered, really, that I heard from all 20 people who ever enjoyed a Cure concert. But most of them can’t read: They interpreted the show preview as a review, despite the fact that it included the concert’s showtime and ticket prices. Take our word for this: It’s difficult to review a show that hasn’t happened yet.
Still, they got the sentiment: the Cure make great records, but they suck live. I’ve seen it. Hell, I was wasting my hard-earned entertainment dollars on Robert Smith when bandwagon fans were listening to Candlebox and mocking him for looking "gay."
But, no, I haven't seen this tour, and I won’t. So here are two reviews from this tour -- one from LA, and one by Cleveland’s own Annie Zaleski , music editor of the St. Louis Riverfront Times, occasional Scene contributor, and host of one swell radio show that broadcasts over the internets every Monday afternoon at 1 p.m. EST.
If you do end up going, have a good time watching Simon Gallup hump his bass. -- DX FerrisThe Cure, with 65DaysofStatic. 7 p.m. Wednesday, June 18, at the Wolstein Center at Cleveland State University, 2000 Prospect Avenue, $37.50 to $57.50, 216-241-5555.