With help from Supreme Court, Alex Arshinkoff keeps sweaty paws in Summit County politics

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It’s a good thing we never participated in one of those celebrity death pools. Although we’re pretty sure British soulstress/black-tar-heroin-fan Amy Winehouse isn’t going to make it through the summer, our track record might suggest otherwise. Take Alex Arshinkoff, for example. The Gayest Straight Guy Ever™ has ruled the Summit County GOP with an iron (and diamond-studded) fist for three decades now, using his unnatural gifts for fundraising and back-room political chicanery to keep Republicans afloat in heavily Democratic Akron. ... But earlier this year, it appeared Arshinkoff’s time had come. Newly installed Secretary of State Jennifer Brunner refused to reappoint Arshinkoff to the local board of elections. Then she rejected the Republican’s second choice, an Arshinkoff sock puppet named Brian Daley. C-Notes, being the poor prognosticating Dorothys that we are, thought Brunner had finally done it: Ding-dong, the bitch was dead! As always, we were wrong. Yesterday, the Ohio Supreme Court ruled against Brunner, clearing the way for Daley to take the helm. The 4-3 decision was no doubt helped by the vote of Maureen O’Connor, whom Arshinkoff has referred to as his “protégé.” But we guess those are the kind of perks that come with 30 years of unchecked power. Looks like we pulled the trigger too soon on that one. But hey: One out of two's not bad: amy-winehouse-in-streets.jpg -- Caleb Hannan

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