Good morning, Cleveland. Here's something to read while you tell TMZ that you're just too busy to talk today.
— TMZ talked to Akron mayor Don Plusquellic outside of the U.S. Conference of Mayors and asked him whether he would cut the ceremonial ribbon if King James ever opened a restaurant in his hometown. He gave an answer, which wasn't the right one, because it didn't involve large scissors and LeBron's torso. (NewsNet5)
— Another Med Mart update has arrived. Second verse, same as the first. (Cleveland.com)
— A 14-month-old baby died of a lethal dose of methadone, which as you can guess, is a drug that should not be given to a baby. Police already have their prime suspects. (Lorain Morning Journal)
— If you haven's listened to the 911 call of one of the gentleman surprised by a local attorney's pants-dropping move, it's worth a minute of your time. (Ohio.com)
We'll be back momentarily. Wait for us over in the chillout tent.