Assault By Stethoscope

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The last thing you should be worried about during a hospital stay is being assaulted by a fellow patient. You're sick, you're ill, you're stressed about treatment — there's enough going on in your head without thinking that some lady in a hospital gown is going to come after you with a stethoscope, and not to play sexy doctor.

But that's what happened at EMH Regional Medical Center according to the Lorain Morning Journal:

Two patients at EMH Regional Medical Center told police a 70-year-old patient walked into their room early Sunday morning and attacked them with a stethoscope, according to an Elyria police report.

One of the victims, a 79-year-old Elyria woman, had been given morphine and told nurses she thought she was dreaming. She suffered bruises and a cut on her forehead.

The other woman said the attack woke her up and she went to the hallway to call for help. She was unharmed and did not wish to press charges.

According to the report, the woman was not cooperating with the hospital staff and believed that the victims "had been plotting against her." At least she didn't grab a metal bedpan, that could have ended badly on multiple fronts.

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