by Kyle Swenson
And the world is handed a new catchphrase.
This news story wouldn’t even be a news story had it not been for the boozebrained inspiration of the protagonist here, Steve Urbansky of Lorain. The 46-year old was collared by police a little after midnight Sunday morning, according to Fox 8. The driver had pulled his car into a snow bank. It got stuck.
Police arrived, did a field sobriety test which Urbansky, yes you guessed it, failed. By way of explanation for his driving, he repeatedly told police he was “just trying to mow the sidewalk.”
We’ve already ordered up some T-shirts and trucker hats emblazoned with the catchphrase. We’re betting this is one emphemism that could really take off.
“Hey man, don’t mind me, jus’ tryin’ to mow some sidewalk.”
“What’d you do last night?” “Nothing, just mowed a little sidewalk.”
“Dude, did you see Beatrice last night, she was mowing that sidewalk like a banshee!”
Get your orders in while supply lasts.