A trio from Chillicothe made every morning news anchor's job easier this morning after they were caught with a goose in their car this week. Pun city has never been easier to get to for the wee-hour TV stewards.
Cops stopped a car on North High Street after they noticed a goose standing in the back window.
When police approached the car, the driver tried to explain. The goose was from one of the suspect's homes, you see, and they were just taking it for a ride, because just like dogs, geese like going for car rides.
The cops didn't buy that excuse, according to the Chillicothe Gazette.
Another suspect then offered a new explanation: they found the goose and it was so dirty they just had to take it home to clean it. See, they're just conscientious environmentalists, taking care of every dirty animal in the county. There was a fancy bathtub and a fresh bar of Dove waiting at home for this dirty, dirty bird.
Shockingly, the cops kept asking questions, not buying that one either.
The driver finally broke down and admitted they found the goose in a park, plied it with food, then captured it with a net. The report doesn't indicate what they planned on doing with the goose or where they were going, but it does indicate that the goose was returned to the park "without incident."
We welcome readers to submit letters regarding articles and content in Cleveland Scene. Letters should be a minimum of 150 words, refer to content that has appeared on Cleveland Scene, and must include the writer's full name, address, and phone number for verification purposes. No attachments will be considered. Writers of letters selected for publication will be notified via email. Letters may be edited and shortened for space.
Email us at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Support Local Journalism.
Join the Cleveland Scene Press Club
Local journalism is information. Information is power. And we believe everyone deserves access to accurate independent coverage of their community and state. Our readers helped us continue this coverage in 2020, and we are so grateful for the support.
Help us keep this coverage going in 2021. Whether it's a one-time acknowledgement of this article or an ongoing membership pledge, your support goes to local-based reporting from our small but mighty team.