Try as we might, we can’t think of a better place to run a criminal enterprise out of than a daycare. Or wait, is that too obvious? Is it one of those it’s-so-unlikely-it’s-likely things? Damn hyper-meta world we live in. You choose.
Crafty/moronic criminal duo Elishama Vinson and Marvin Lear were running drugs from a home in Westwood, near Cincinnati, according to the Enquirer. The home doubled as a daycare center; Vinson is a card carrying, state-stamped child care provider.
Her Type B license allows her to take care of up to 6 children, and state records show she was currently responsible for two. As part of the certification, a state inspector was required to sniff through the place twice a year.
But had those inspectors really nosed around, they would have found Vinson and her friend were up to more than fixing bottles (or actually, that’s exactly what they were doing*). When police raided the residence this week, they recovered large amount of weed and coke ready for the open market. Lear — whose record is spotted with a previous felony drug conviction — was also found with a loaded handgun.
Of course, this being a daycare, there were children in the home at the time of the raid. A 2-year-old girl Vinson was caring for was on site, as well as a 3-year-old cousin and the woman’s 10-year-old daughter.
And of course, this being the American bureaucratic honeycomb at work, the daycare can still legally operate; it’s just lost government funding until an investigation is complete.
*Bottles: 90s street lingo for crack vials. See: Clockers, Price, Richard; The Wire; etc.**
** We know, minus 10 points for explaining our own pun.
We welcome readers to submit letters regarding articles and content in Cleveland Scene. Letters should be a minimum of 150 words, refer to content that has appeared on Cleveland Scene, and must include the writer's full name, address, and phone number for verification purposes. No attachments will be considered. Writers of letters selected for publication will be notified via email. Letters may be edited and shortened for space.
Email us at email@example.com.
Cleveland Scene works for you, and your support is essential.
Our small but mighty local team works tirelessly to bring you high-quality, uncensored news and cultural coverage of Cleveland and beyond.
Unlike many newspapers, ours is free – and we'd like to keep it that way, because we believe, now more than ever, everyone deserves access to accurate, independent coverage of their community.
Whether it's a one-time acknowledgement of this article or an ongoing pledge, your support helps keep Cleveland's true free press free.