Dumb people call 911 for a whole truckload of dumb reasons. These stories pop up every once in awhile, but it really takes a full day on the interwebs to not only get a full picture of the insane reasons folks dial the emergency number, but also to discover that if you tried to dream up a colossally inappropriate reason to dial 911, someone has already probably dialed 911 for that reason, except for real.
The Dayton Daily News investigated 911 abuse in Montgomery County and found, not surprisingly, that it costs taxpayers plenty of dough. While the full report is required reading, we also commend the paper for compiling audio from some of the craziest 911 calls they discovered. There's a guy calling to ask about the score of a basketball game, a guy calling about a white bat, some lady calling for a ride to work, and more.
Enjoy, Ohio, these are your fellow citizens.