How to Deal With the Heat This Week

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It's going to be balmy this week. The kind of uncomfortable sweaty oven atmosphere that makes you want to curl up in the refrigerator. Weather folks say the heat index will regularly hover over 100 each afternoon this week, with actual temps in the 90s.

To that we say: OK. It's hot, we get it. Drink plenty of fluids, only go places with air conditioning, avoid strenuous workouts like running, cycling, walking, or breathing during the afternoon hours.

We're in this together for the next five days, so here are our two tips about how to deal with the heat. First, a note on talking about it, presented in convenient graph form:

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(The line goes infinitely upward at 90 both because once you're that old, you can talk about whatever the hell you want to, and also because once you're that old, dementia combined with heat-induced delirium means you'll forget you just said, "How about that weather" two minutes ago and say it again. And again.)

Our second tip: find a cool spot to chill, baby. It'll be over soon enough.

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