Conventional wisdom states that you shouldn't get too drunk at your own wedding. Other people's weddings? Booze it up, black out, hit on anything that moves. But your own? You want to be able to remember the special night, and you want to be able to perform on the special night.
Get blotto, and that's not going to happen. Of course, if you're drunk enough to cause a scene and get arrested, you can always remember the evening's proceedings with the help of a police report.
According to the report, cops were called to the New Orleans Party Center because of a drunk and belligerent 35-year-old Cleveland man who wedding guests say had too much to drink and started fighting with his stepson. Initially, his lovely bride said the cops should just haul his no-good-ass away, but then changed her mind. Unfortunately, the groom ruined everyone's plans of escaping without an arrest when he refused to cooperate with the police and provide his ID.
So, the groom was arrested on charges of disorderly conduct and carted off to jail for his wedding night.
This stirring tale of love gone wrong and a forewarning to all prospective couples out there ends with this sweet note: "The groom passed out in his cell, soiled himself and was charged with disorderly conduct while intoxicated."