Raging hormones, loneliness, and a bout of horniness will drive even the most self-respecting and even-keeled man to do weird, out-of-character, regrettable things. West Sixth street is littered with the ghosts of such acts of desperation.
Some acts are more desperate than others, however. Consider the case of a man who recently stole a semi to break into an Elyria AdultMart to steal a $799 life-sized sex doll.
According to the Chronicle-Telegram, a semi with its trailer detached was stolen from an industrial plant in Elyria. Surveillance video at the AdultMart shows the suspect backing the semi into the backdoor three times before gaining entrance. Inside, the only thing missing was the pricey love doll, which was no no ordinary blow-up doll according to store manager, but a carefully crafted realistic mimicry of the female anatomy.
There are no leads or suspects at the time, though police ask residents to keep an eye out for male neighbors who haven't left their house all day, or who have recently been spotted at Costco buying economy-sized packages of lotion.