Men have all kinds of sexual kinks and fetishes. Combine that with moments of obsession and desperation, and men end up sticking their penises in all sorts of weird, inappropriate places. Exhibit A: Anyone who's ever slept with Renee Zellweger.
Exhibit B: 32-year-old Edwin Tobergta of Hamilton, OH, who was caught having sex with an inflatable pool raft.
WAFB reports that Tobergta stole the raft and began having sexy time with it. We're not sure of the logistics, but the neighbor who witnessed the man-on-raft love session got a good look. The unfortunate bystander hollered at Tobergta, who then pulled up his pants and tossed the raft over a fence. (Ew.)
Cops arrived and charged him with public indecency, and this wasn't the first instance of Tobergta and Little Tobergta misbehaving with inanimate objects. He'd previously drew a public indecency charge after being caught having sex with an inflatable pumpkin Halloween decoration in 2002.
Needless to say, if you live in Hamilton, your lawn decorations and pool accessories are not safe.