Good afternoon, Cleveland. Here's some stuff to read while you figure out who your mother would support in an election, you or your sibling.
— Testimony from the students who allegedly smoked pot, drank, and had sex with a female teacher all at the same time. There were five of them. This definitely reads like something from Penthouse Letters. (Journal News)
— If the cops show up and you mistake them for a taxi taking you to get food, you are probably not sober. (Strongsville Patch)
— A writer from The Atlantic goes after the Clinic's semi-obsessive health initiatives for employees. Scene's owners have a slightly less strict batch of guidelines. (Crain's)
— It's brother vs. brother for mayor of a small Ohio town. Campaign literature surely includes who gave who wedgies and whether either of them stole loose change from their mom's purse. (Ohio.com)