Willoughby police say once the man was taken to a holding cell, he spit on an officer and pooped all over the place and then saw fit to spread his feces on the walls and bars, Quills style.
Here's the official word from Willoughby Municipal Court:
Elijah E. Orr, 20, of 110 E. 211 St., is charged with third-degree felony robbery and two counts of fifth-degree felony harassment with a bodily substance.
Get this: If convicted, Orr could spend up to seven years in a prison. Seven years? For a shoplift and a shit? Me oh my.